I can't tell them to be patient. I can't tell them to hope or to wait. There's a time, a time frame which is holding us all captive. We're in shackles dragging across the hollow halls and wrapped tightly around my barely beating heart. That won't change. It's not a thing that I can fantasize out of and wake up with them beside me. It isn't something I can taunt out of my head. It's reality. And the reality of it is that we are separated, for an immense amount of time, and holding onto "eventually" won't make the pain any less, or put my head back on. I don't see pain as eternal but I do see it as inevitable. What is missing from my everyday life is more than happiness or fun, it's love. That bond that I have held onto for all my life suddenly tested, crashing my world down. It takes much more than a year to build it all back up again.